Parenting Autism From A Mom’s View
Autism Awareness Day, Light It Up Blue
Written From A Mom’s Heart. Nothing More.
This is purely written from a mom’s heart (my heart) and nothing more. I am not writing to create awareness. I think those of you who are reading this are painfully aware, and I am not much interested in presenting you with facts or statistics. You can read them everywhere. I also don’t want to talk about managing autism right now, therapies, diets, etc. I am sorry if I come across cynical or down hearted in any way; I don’t think it does. Maybe I am today, and that’s today. Every day is different for all of us, but you already knew that.
Autism Awareness, not so much.
I didn’t sit down to write about Autism Awareness or anything personal today. I never do. But then I see all of your posts. Reflections, encouragement and so on. Truth is, I don’t write much about his Autism diagnosis. Maybe, like him the concrete things in life are easier to deal with so I stick with our activities. I wonder who would really care anyway about our journey. Then I read what all of you have written and think maybe you do care. It’s good to share your journey.
I have never been in denial of his diagnosis. I needed it to move forward, feel better, and get help or relief. Am I still in mourning? Yes. Every day. Yes, I know I have to move on from that, but I will do it when I am ready and that just isn’t today. Believe, I understand moving on since I teach him about it everyday. In my heart, I still haven’t and I don’t share my heart much with anyone but my husband.
Loving and learning.
Who is my little boy? He is NOT his diagnosis. I have a sweet, awesome little boy who frustrates the heck out of me. He loves to run and jump, tickle and laugh, hug his teddy bear and give me kisses. Why isn’t that enough. Oh it is just too much to explain unless you can see the whole picture. I think he is happy. I think I do what I can for him and I think I give him what he needs. Not a day goes by where I don’t wonder what I need to do next. Do you feel the same?
Parenting the autism or parenting the child
What is it like to parent an autistic child? You will have your own answer. For me, it’s being one step ahead at all times. Being flexible to his inflexibility and loving beyond limitations. I made that sound great, right? Another truth, the day feels a little less glamorous than that. There are tears, loud voices, stomping and huffing but there is also hugs, laughter, and smiles I am at all times in constant preparation for the future. Are you?
Living the moment or the future.
Parenting an autistic child is not always about living in the moment or enjoying the moment as much as I would like it to be. It comes down to doing what will best suit him next week, next month, next year, 3 years from now and so on. Our play is carefully thought out to better help him play with others, activities are presented in ways that are appropriate, and our conversations meant to show him how to interact with others. If you weren’t a parent of an autistic child, you would probably give me all sorts of flack about hindering the creativity of the child. For us it is the best answer. I teach him what he needs to do to navigate a harsh world. I provide stability through our “storms”. I give consistency to the mixed up place in his mind. What does he do, he gives LOVE. I do what I do, whether it is enjoyable or not for his LOVE. I bet you do it too.
My job is just as much detective and locksmith as it is mommy (tired, frustrated, happy mommy). I am constantly searching for what will move him, inspire him and bring out his ability to enjoy the world. Once I find a little something (a glimmer of hope), I have to quickly become a locksmith to fashion the perfect key to unlock the glass door that separates him from that passion yet to be discovered. I have a basketful of keys that didn’t quite fit and plenty more to make. Do you have a key?
This special day is every day.
Autism Awareness day is special day. Every day in our lives is that special day. We have worked hard to get where we are now and we have miles to go. The road is constantly breaking off into multiple directions, giving us new choices. Some are right and some are not. Sometimes we back track only to find we backed up to a place we didn’t want to be either. Are you still walking a path? My advice, if I should be able to give any, you are not alone. Just make sure to pack snacks and an Ipad.
Here are many more wonderful articles to read about living with Autism. I hope you will stop by some of them! We are all in this together!
Dear Social Worker At My Son’s Preschool from Making Time for Mommy
3 Phrases No Parent Wants To Hear from Lemon Lime Adventures
Autism Awareness (Guest Post from A Mom) from Crafty Mom’s Share
Autism Awareness Day for Us from the Chaos And The Clutter
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